CouplesSpark Latest Conflicts

Trust and boundaries. Should we be able to meet members of the opposite sex who are our work colleagues for dinner?

Sun, 06 May 2012 02:14:34 -0400

I was brought up to believe that it is wrong to go out with members of the opposite sex for dinner. I seen her last night up close to another older man that she identified as her colleague and said that everything was innocent. I nearly died when I thought I seen them kissing or leaning in close.

I have some trust issues. She won’t accept that we are in Australia now and we don’t do that here.

we are engaged, but she doesn't want to get married until I make a certain income. she looses SS if she does get married me 52 her 49

Sat, 05 May 2012 21:05:40 -0400

I think love is more important than money, I make enough to pay the bills, she has lots of money.

My girlfriend is secretly dating his ex.

Fri, 13 Apr 2012 10:05:18 -0400

My girlfriend told me to stop talking to my ex, and she told me she didn’t have any contact with hers. Accidentally I saw his ex was texting her, I told my gf if it was him but she lied and told me it was another friend who had the same name. I didn’t believe and spied her phone, I found out they dated and told each other “I love you” and she lied about where she was going with me to him.

I've been begging for respect and he just doesn't seem to hear me

Mon, 26 Mar 2012 14:15:17 -0400

After a year plus of dealing with bouts of depression, anger issues, anxiety problems and a ton of baggage, I still have to remind him that I exist. I’ve stuck with him through all of it, helped him through things and tried to explain to him that he can’t treat me the way he does and expect it not to leave lasting marks on how I feel about him.

He has problems with self esteem because he feels stupid. He complains about not being able to get a decent paying job. So, I have helped him go back to college, to get a degree so that he can start to see himself in a better light and to enable him to reach a goal of getting a better job. He does struggle with some courses and I am right there to help him when he asks for it. (I am in college as well working on a post-grad degree). His anger issues make it really difficult sometimes and I really just want to scream at him to just shut up, but I don’t and just try to remember where he is coming from.

He doesn’t handle stress well at all and the most hateful things come out of his mouth. He doesn’t understand that although he has “gotten over” whatever made him angry, the things he says have really hurt and I can’t just bounce back. I’ve explained it all to him so many times, and he seems to understand once he has calmed down, unfortunately within a few weeks, it all happens again.

This relationship has been a huge strain on me and I have worked so hard to try to be understanding, studied everything I could about depression, found ways to try and communicate better, been so patient with his needs and progress, handle all aspects of our home life (he has never had to do anything as it relates to the care of this home), made sure all his needs for college are met, put him and his needs first when he was down…all while going to two colleges full time, working on projects as part of externships at college, working on my thesis, managing finances, finding money where there is none to make it work,etc and only asking for respect.

I rarely talk with him about how I feel because he takes it wrong. He can’t process information without feeling attacked and I understand that is part of the depression/anger/anxiety issue he faces. I get that, but he gets upset because I don’t talk to him. It’s a catch-22 for sure.

All of the things I do for him are done because I love him and I know that relationships are work, especially when there are mental issues involved. This past weekend was another blowup over something minor. Once again, things are said that cut me deeply and I am having to explain to him everything again. He asks me what I want in a relationship over and over despite my having told him more times than I can count. When I talk with him and he has to think about it, he remembers what I want, but it goes away in a few days.

I need to feel respected before I can be intimate. I struggle with this a lot. I have never been one to have sex just to have sex. To me, it is important. He can’t seem to understand that and gets mad at me for not feeling cozy after he has gone on a rant again.

Why can’t he just think before he acts? Why doesn’t he see that the constant disregard for what I do, have done and will do is so disrespectful? Why can’t he see that all I want is for him to listen, to hear ME, to notice ME and to see ME? Am I wasting my time here?

my boy friend once loved me very much. but now he is telling that he hates me and he is avoiding me totally.

Wed, 22 Feb 2012 18:24:26 -0500

he doesnt respect my feelings. always avoiding my cals my msgs.he doesnt care anything about me.very egoistic and selfish. how ever i cry or beg he s not at all bothered. very stubborn.

Oral Pleasures, why not ?

Fri, 03 Feb 2012 11:48:06 -0500

She doesn’t know how much I enjoy her oral pleasures. I am on cloud 9, and she just does not want to do this for me, unless she is drunk.

My mom has unrealizable expectations

Thu, 02 Feb 2012 03:22:49 -0500

No matter what I do she is still not happy with me. I do nice things for her but find myself avoiding time together because it’s never good enough.

Crabs ?

Thu, 02 Feb 2012 02:55:54 -0500

I prefer them deep fried

My GF wakes me up in the middle of the night to bang the head board, and sometimes I just want to sleep... I mean really sleep, what to do ?

Thu, 02 Feb 2012 02:53:53 -0500

I prefer the morning boner….

Profile pictures and little lies

Mon, 09 Jan 2012 12:37:14 -0500

My boyfriend posted a profile picture of him with a very attractive girl on his Facebook. He met her in Jamaica on vacation a little while back.Normally, this wouldn’t bother me but his friends posted comments telling him his gf is hot. He did not correct them or remove the comments. He said he didn’t have time to change it but he was very active on FB that day on my newsfeed.

Girlfriend allowing friends to sleep in our bed

Wed, 28 Dec 2011 04:02:19 -0500

we live together and are university students. my problem that i have is that she will continuously have these friends (female primarily but sometimes a male) spend the night and sleep in our bed with her when i’m away. I trust that she’s not cheating. my biggest concern is that my bed doesn’t feel “ours”. i dont see the reason for friends to share the bed, the couch works just fine.

Uncompassionate/unempathetic husband

Tue, 20 Dec 2011 19:41:20 -0500

My husband of 7 years has lost his compassion & empathy for me and our (my biological children). He is tough love all the way. His change in manner makes me and the children feel we can’t do anything right. He constantly tells us he loves us and can’t live without us but I need my husband to have real compassion & empathy in certain situations. I am not physically attracted to his tough love personality. I have talked to him about this multiple times and it always ends up with it being my fault he is the way he is. I am intelligent, bubbly, friendly and kind towards others. He is like a stone most of the time. When we are alone, he is intelligent and fun to be around. Around others, the stone appears. I don’t want to give up on this man because he used to have it in him.

I can't choose between my boyfriend and a new guy.

Wed, 14 Dec 2011 16:22:01 -0500

Boyfriend: I’ve been in a long-distance relationship with him for 3 years and been friends with him for 6 years. He treats me like a queen when we are together, but I find myself having to keep communication alive when he’s gone. I have asked him to try to communicate with me more multiple times, but nothing ever changes. I worry that he doesn’t love me, but doesn’t know how to tell me either.

Naming our child.

Thu, 08 Dec 2011 02:28:05 -0500

My girlfriend has a son named Jaden. She is pregnant with our child and likes the name Landen. While I like the name, I feel people will think we’re trying to do an “en” theme. Morever, I think if we have a third child and their name is different, they’re going to wonder why they didn’t get the “en”!

Friends with an old crush

Tue, 22 Nov 2011 16:31:45 -0500

My BF is still “best friends” with a girl he used to like (but she told him she just wants to be friends.) He is constantly texting her, going over to hang out one on one,and they even took a nap together! (separate beds)I think she keeps him around for the attention and I don’t want them hanging out so frequently. Is it fair that I ask him to see her less?

He believes in astrology because his family does.

Tue, 22 Nov 2011 01:32:16 -0500

We decided to plan our marriage in December because it’s convenient for both to take vacation around that time. His family believes in astrology and according to them, it won’t be good time to marry.So,now,he says he is getting negative vibes and doesn’t want to take any risks. Marriage is an important affair and he wants to postpone the marriage until January end (inconvenient for me at work)

my boyfriend of 14 yrs has cheated on me more than once and he thinks that there is nothing wrong with that

Sun, 13 Nov 2011 11:09:32 -0500

nd have tried so hard to make it work i go to counseling he does not he says he has tried but how can that be when he is cheating and breaking promises?

Double standard ,my wife can have friends over and have drinks with them when ever she wants. If her sisters in town a friend is having problems etc.

Thu, 29 Sep 2011 08:41:46 -0400

When my wife comes home and I have friends over she freaks out. I make sure the inside is clean, I have 2 or 3 friends over we are drinking on the front porch with a little music, quiet and respectful, with the Windows closed so she doesnt hear or smell smoke. It’s 1 time a week.

My wife of 2,5 years told me she cheated on me. She says they only kissed through the night. Lots of booze. No sex.

Fri, 27 Apr 2012 14:06:16 -0400

I have neglegted her the past few months, due to stress, etc. We went out with friends, I went home cause I didn’t enjoy it. She stayed behind and scored a random guy. Don’t know if I can trust her again.

We can't agree on which house to buy. I want one house, while he wants another.

Sat, 17 Sep 2011 15:44:29 -0400

I found a house I really like. It’s in a great neighborhood with great schools, lots of square footage, the home value in this area is great. It is much closer to my job than the house he wants. I am the one getting the mortgage and buying the house, because he is self-employed and proving his income will be hard. He wants a different house and refuses to even consider the house I like.

She's a virgin, I'm not. Weve been together for one month. She doesn't know I masturbate. Should I stop masturbating until she's ready? Or keep at it?

Mon, 12 Sep 2011 15:35:53 -0400

So my girlfriend of one month is a virgin. In fact I’m her first boyfriend and the only guy she’s ever even held hands with. Because she’s a virgin, I feel somewhat guilty about masturbating. Should I stop?

Two Places to live

Sun, 11 Sep 2011 23:18:01 -0400

Got a job, have to work in a town w/ population of 4000. Nothing there, middle of desert. Could live an hour and half away, better for families. We have a little girl. More to do, better schools, closer to big city. Newer and cheaper housing. Could possibly commute with other employees.

Hubby makes sexual comments! (The other post won't let me view votes or comments, so I had to repost!)

Sun, 11 Sep 2011 17:31:57 -0400

Hubby makes inappropriate sexual comments around my family & friends.They aren’t about us.They are about sex & sex toys!I’ve asked him to stop but he won’t.My family has made comments about it.He’s 49 yrs old.It’s time to grow up!

hubby makes sexual comments in front of others

Sun, 11 Sep 2011 12:29:25 -0400

When we’re around friends or sometimes even family, my husband makes sexual comments about very private things.Not necessarily about us, but sex & toys in general. I feel so uncomfortable when he does this. My family has made comments to me about it!He said it’s not a big deal. He doesn’t see anything wrong with it.I’ve asked him to stop,but he continues. I’m left humiliated at times.

Left behind!

Sat, 10 Sep 2011 22:32:43 -0400

We were going to go to a movie/happyhour. We were to leave home @ 6:10. Movie started @ 7:00 I was home by6:05 but he left w/o me.He called me & said he was on his way to movie.He left w/o me because he wanted to get there early, I could drive myself. I told him to come back & pick me up.(he was only 1 mile away. He refused & went without me. I stayed home alone. He doesn’t think it was a big deal